love makes seman taste better
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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