She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
