If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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