I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
he shaved USA in his pubs
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
