if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
