I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
