You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
