i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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