the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Randomize