All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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