i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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