WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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