he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
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