But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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