Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
