Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
