There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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