gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize
