I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
