Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
