so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
