i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize