everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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