My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
