you guys were way drunker than both of me
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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