friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
