He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
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