Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
