He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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