Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Randomize
