He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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