She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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