it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize