Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
