"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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