ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
