..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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