I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize