shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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