apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
