I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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