There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
