I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
