Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
