God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
