Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
