Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
