Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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