dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You made out with two different species that night
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
