I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
No subtext here. People are naked.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
