Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
