Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
